Local
Officer Wears Every Piece of Tactical Gear to Routine Traffic Stop
Motorist "slightly concerned" when officer approached with night vision goggles at noon.
1 month ago
Chud Johnson News Staff
A routine traffic stop for an expired registration turned unexpectedly intense Tuesday when the responding officer arrived wearing what witnesses described as "every single piece of tactical equipment from the station."
"He had like... so much stuff," said stopped motorist Karen Williams, 34. "Vest, extra vest, pouches everywhere, some kind of helmet, goggles that I think were night vision? It was 2 PM. The sun was out."
Officer Brad "Tacticool" Henderson defended his equipment choices, explaining that "you never know what you're going to encounter out there."
"Sure, today it was an expired tag," Henderson said, adjusting his third utility belt. "But what if it hadn't been? What if it had been... something else? I'd rather have seventeen knives and not need them than need seventeen knives and only have sixteen."
Henderson's sergeant has scheduled a meeting to discuss "appropriate force presentation" and "possibly seeing someone about the knife thing."
"He had like... so much stuff," said stopped motorist Karen Williams, 34. "Vest, extra vest, pouches everywhere, some kind of helmet, goggles that I think were night vision? It was 2 PM. The sun was out."
Officer Brad "Tacticool" Henderson defended his equipment choices, explaining that "you never know what you're going to encounter out there."
"Sure, today it was an expired tag," Henderson said, adjusting his third utility belt. "But what if it hadn't been? What if it had been... something else? I'd rather have seventeen knives and not need them than need seventeen knives and only have sixteen."
Henderson's sergeant has scheduled a meeting to discuss "appropriate force presentation" and "possibly seeing someone about the knife thing."
Disclaimer: This article is satire. All content is fictional and intended for entertainment purposes only. Any resemblance to actual events or persons is purely coincidental and hilarious.